AVATAR: Parodies
by America's Roast Beef Yes Sir
Summary: Ever wondered if Sokka could be Shaft, or Aang could be Neo?... !Caution! May be a little heavy on the language...


_**Disclaimer: I do not own Avatar or any of its properties and I am not attempting plagiarism.**_

_If some of you have read my other story, AVATAR: Revisions, AVATAR: Parodies is similar to that one. I'm attempting to build spoofs between the Avatar world and today's modern cinematic world. This time, I'll try not to post this one in script-form, but I might change my mind. _

_The fun thing about this fic is that you'll have to guess which movie I'm comparing the segments to. Some might be mind-numbingly obvious, others a complete blur, but I'll try to make the comparisons really clear. _

_So, here's another totally unecessary fic, AVATAR: Parodies._

_-_

**1**

Zuko and Iroh floated on the raft as it carried them away from the hellish Northern Water Tribe. Looking back for a final glance at the tribe, Zuko watched as the water tribe folk celebrated their well-deserved victory. Once again, it was a failed attempt to seize the Avatar, but one day he'll get him. It was just a matter of when...

The prince watched floating debris of the sunken fire ships dance around their raft, hypnotizing him into deep sleep. Iroh was off at the corner of the raft, holding a rope that was tied to a bucket, attempting to catch an arctic fish.

"I'm surprised, Prince Zuko," Iroh said, trying to seek out the emotions that Zuko was feeling at the moment, "Surprised that you are not at this moment trying to catch the Avatar." He tried to be as convincing as he could. When he pulled the bucket out of the water, tiny fish swam inside, forcing him to dump the fish back in the freezing water.

"I'm tired," he simply replied, looking out into the distance as the freezing mist blocked out his final view of the water tribe.

"Then you should rest." Iroh responded, "A man needs his rest."

Zuko agreed. He laid down on the surface of the rough raft, finally drifting off to sleep.

-

When Zuko woke up, he looked around frantically. Iroh was nowhere to be seen.

"Uncle!" he yelled as loud as he could out into the sea. "Uncle!" He was left all alone on the raft. Zuko broke into a heavy sob.

"What the hell's your problem? I'm right here!" Iroh exclaimed, looking freaked out. Zuko turned around to see Iroh looking horrified.

"Oh."

"And just in case, take this." Iroh threw a volleyball at Zuko's face. "That should keep you busy for the next few weeks."

"Wilson!" Zuko said in excitement as he looked at the ball.

Iroh exploded. "It's Spalding, dumbass! What's wrong with you today?"

* * *

Jet had been planning it all along. He had his blasting jelly, he had his dam, and he was going to flush out those villagers. However, Katara pulled a complete one-eighty on her, and he almost had Aang. Now he was frozen from his neck to his feet onto a tree. But, he pulled it off. The village is destroyed. 

"Sokka didn't make it in time," Aang sadly said.

"All those people," the horrified Katara declared. She glared at the freedom fighter. "Jet, you monster!"

"This was a victory, Katara," Jet said, as Smellerbee and Pipsqueak appeared behind the frozen Jet. Aang kept an eye on them. "Remember that. The fire nation is gone and this valley will be safe."

"It will be safe..." a voice behind Katara announced. It was Sokka, to Jet's suprisement. "Without _you_."

"Sokka!" Katara grasped her brother.

"I warned the villagers just in time about your plan," the warrior explained.

"Sokka, you fool!" Jet said. "we could've freed this valley!"

"Who would be free if everyone was dead?" Sokka replied.

"You traitor!"

"No, Jet," Sokka retaliated. "You became the traitor when you stopped protecting innocent people."

Aang walked up to Jet, and pulled the hookswords (which were still attached to his hands) out of his grasp, which accidentally shattered the ice that froze him. Before Jet could rampage on Aang, Smellerbee and Pipsqueak grabbed Jet and tied his hands around the tree behind him.

"Aang," Smellerbee began, "You can go ahead and bounce on us. We got your back."

Aang, holding the broadswords, led Katara to Appa as Sokka followed.

"Oh, no you didn't," Jet said to Smellerbee in disbelief. "No you didn't! Hey, Aang! Aang! Come back here and fight me like a man!" He cocked his head back at Smellerbee. "You disloyal fool-ass bitch-made punk. Aang!" The airbender didn't listen as Appa already took off with everyone on board.

Jet was completely freaked out. Longshot and the Duke arrived at the scene. "Oh, okay... Alright... you think you can do this? You think you can do this to _ME_? You futhamuckas will be playing ball at a _fire nation concentration camp_ when I'm finished with you! Burn program, mutts! 23-hour lockdown!" He tried to shake out of their grasp. "Who the _hell_ do you think you're screwing with, I'M JET! I run shit here! You just _live_ here!"

The freedom fighters left Jet tied to the tree. "Yeah, that's right. You better walk away!" He yelled at his former teammates. "KING KONG AIN'T GOT _SHIZZ_ ON ME!"

* * *

Unfortunately, the Terra Team's assault on the drill didn't go so well. Ty Lee, the skillful acrobat, blocked out all of the earthbenders' chi. Katara tended to the soldiers as the confused General Sung looked on. 

"What's wrong with him?" the general curiously asked. "He doesn't look injured."

"His chi is blocked," Katara answered. She spoke to the soldier, "Who did this to you?"

The soldier didn't answer, looking mindless and petrified. Suddenly, Sokka approached the soldier, lit a match, and moved it in a wavy fashion right in front of the soldier's eyes.

"Now tell me," Sokka said, "What did you see?"

"Good-zilla," the bender mumbled over and over.

"Godzilla?" Katara questioned.

"I could've sworn it was Azula," Aang said. "Oh well, same thing..."

-

_You guys know which movies are which?_


End file.
